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We could leave a message for the search and rescue team and then just go on the piss while we wait for them to pick us up.
Lowney courted controversy shortly before the contest, when he stated in an interview that Eurvision was "just an excuse for a load of TV executives to go on the piss on expenses".
Perhaps it would have helped if he had played a bit of links golf post-US Open instead of going on the piss at glastonbury and wimbledon and helping out with the BBC i've-made-it documentary which was still broadcast on the Sunday evening, ridiculously so.